Dating Tips

How to get a better Response from your ad

Successful online dating starts with the first moment someone sees your profile.
It's the most important moment in online dating.

Honesty is the best policy!
Each ad should be well thought out and reflect elements of who you are and what you are seeking. Don't lie and pretend that you are someone that you are not… we all deserve to be with people who complement us. Being up front from the start will attract someone your truly compatible with and save both of you unnecessary drama and pain later on. Don’t enter false information or you will miss ‘that’ perfect person. We all know lies are no platform to begin a true relationship on, and all of us at Drive By Dating think your ace just the way you are… so let it shine!

A picture is worth a thousand words.
And why not put your best face forward! Ads of people who submit pictures get more hits then those without. You do not have to submit a picture with your ad, but it might be worth considering. Make sure the picture reflects who you are, and remember, don’t upload pictures that may give the wrong impression or you risk getting the wrong ‘type’ of attention.

Be polite…
When you receive a response to your ad, it is either going to spark your interest, or not interest you at all. Even if the e-mail doesn't light your fire, it is always common courtesy to send a response, even if it is to say "Thanks, but no thanks." After all, this person was interested enough in you to send you an email, so take it as a compliment and send back an acknowledgement that the email was received. If the email does light your fire, then respond to it and enjoy!

Responding to an Ad

The law of averages…
When you are searching our database, you need to realize that not everyone will be responding and not everyone will be interested in what you have to offer. That’s true with everything in life, so don’t take it personally. Why not respond to more than one ad at once? While it can work, don't go overboard with your first email. Unless specifically asked, don't go into long tirades about what a good lover you are and what you will do with him/her/them when you meet. Try and introduce yourself and let the advertisers know a little bit about you. Once you receive a response to your email it is time to start giving more information. This may be a good time to talk on the phone to get a better feel for the person. Then, when you feel comfortable, it is time for the first meeting.

Meeting your Date

Safety first…
The first meeting is a big step. This should be fun, but also bear in mind that safety is an issue. That is why we recommend that the initial meeting be at a public place and either during the lunch hour or right after work. If things go well, you can arrange for an immediate, more intimate setting, or you can schedule one at a more convenient time and place.

Common Courtesy
This should be the norm, but unfortunately this sometimes gets lost in the shuffle. The first thing to remember is that NO MEANS NO. Just because you meet does not mean that he/she/they have to like you and want to take things further... Why should it? Things may change after a face-to-face meeting, so if the other party wants to break it off, do so. This is not a personal insult. Just take it in your stride and remember that it could be you on the other end one day, so play it cool. Remind yourself of all you wonderful qualities you have to offer, smile and quietly say “…next!” All jokes aside, if this does happen, it’s may be a good time to re-evaluate what your really looking for and how you might be portraying yourself to others.
If you are invited to the other party's home, remember that you are a guest and you are still learning about each other. You don't live there. Dress appropriately for the situation, always bring a gift, and be polite. By this stage you should know a little bit about this person and just because you are entering into a possible relationship doesn't mean you should treat this situation any differently then if you had met in another arena. Good manners go a long way in breaking through those first-time jitters. If you respect the other party, just as you would at work or school, you will do fine, and you will never lack new dating opportunities. Word gets around, and the fools suffer while the good ones are in high demand!

10 safety tips for your next date

DriveByDating.com.au offers a fun and secure environment to meet other quality singles. It’s also a great place to build loving and trusting friendships that can lead to lasting, offline relationships. Whether you decide to correspond online or meet member’s offline, please use sound judgment and be responsible for your conduct. In both the virtual and real worlds, common sense is your best safety tool.

Start slow
Watch out for someone who seems too good to be true. Begin by communicating solely via email, then look for odd behavior or inconsistencies. The person at the other end may not be who or what he or she says. Trust your instincts. If anything makes you uncomfortable, walk away for your own safety and protection.

Guard your anonymity
All correspondence between DriveByDating.com.au members takes place through our double-blind system, ensuring your true identity is protected until you decide to reveal it. Never include your last name, email address, home address, phone number, place of work or any other identifying information in your free profile or initial messages. Stop communicating with anyone who pressures you for personal information or attempts in any way to trick you into revealing it. If you choose to share your personal email address with another member it is strongly recommended you create a new email address with Hotmail, Yahoo! Mail or another free email service provider just for this purpose and ensure you do not include your full name in the sender's name. Also, avoid using work emails as it's often easy to work out who sally.smith@abccompany.com.au is. Trust your instincts, move cautiously and be selective.

Exercise caution and common sense
Careful, thoughtful decisions generally yield better dating results. Guard against trusting the untrustworthy; suitors must earn your trust gradually, through consistently honorable, forthright behavior. Take all the time you need to test for a trustworthy person and pay careful attention along the way. If you suspect someone is lying, he or she probably is, so act accordingly. Be responsible about romance, and don’t fall in love at the click of a mouse. Don’t become prematurely intimate with someone, even if that intimacy only occurs online. If you mutually decide to cross the point of no return, be smart and protect yourself.

Request a photo
A photo will give you a good idea of the person's appearance, which may prove helpful in achieving a gut feeling. In fact, it’s best to view several images of someone in various settings: casual, formal, indoor and outdoors. If all you hear are excuses about why you can't see a photo, consider that he or she has something to hide. Since DriveByDating.com.au offers free scanning services to its members, there’s no reason someone shouldn’t be able to provide you a photo.

Chat on the phone
A phone call can reveal much about a person’s communication and social skills. Consider your security and do not reveal your personal phone number to a stranger. Try a mobile phone number instead or use local telephone blocking techniques to prevent your phone number from appearing in Caller ID. Only give out your phone number when you feel completely comfortable.

Meet when YOU are ready
The beauty of meeting and relating online is that you can collect information gradually, later choosing whether to pursue the relationship in the offline world. You never are obligated to meet anyone, regardless of your level of online intimacy. And even if you decide to arrange a meeting, you always have the right to change your mind. It’s possible that your decision to keep the relationship at the anonymous level is based on a hunch that you can’t logically explain. Trust yourself. Go with your instincts.

Watch for red flags
Pay attention to displays of anger, intense frustration or attempts to pressure or control you. Acting in a passive-aggressive manner, making demeaning or disrespectful comments or any physically inappropriate behavior are all red flags. You should be concerned if your date exhibits any of the following behavior without providing an acceptable explanation:
• Provides inconsistent information about age, interests, appearance, marital status, profession, employment, etc.
• Refuses to speak to you on the phone after establishing ongoing, online intimacy.
• Fails to provide direct answers to direct questions.
• Appears significantly different in person from his or her online persona.
• Never introduces you to friends, professional associates or family members.

Meet in a safe place
When you choose to meet offline, always tell a friend where you are going and when you will return. Leave your date’s name, telephone number and where your going with your friend And most importantly, stick to it. Never arrange for your date to pick you up at home. Provide your own transportation, meet in a public place at a time with many people around, and when the date is over, leave on your own as well. A familiar restaurant or coffee shop, at a time when a lot of other people will be present, is often a fine choice. If you decide to move to another location, take your own car. When the timing is appropriate, thank your date for getting together and say goodbye. Avoid hikes, bike rides or drives in remote areas for the first few dates. If you decide to move to another location then take your own car. Most predators will avoid taking action in broad daylight when surrounded by people. Or take a friend along. When looking to meet your date in the beginning, ask a friend to meet up with you at a pre-arranged time. Work out a signal with your friend to indicate whether you would prefer that he or she stay with you.

Take extra caution outside your area
If you are flying in from another city, arrange for your own car and hotel room. Do not disclose the name of your hotel and never allow your date to make the arrangements for you. Rent a car at the airport and drive directly to your hotel. Call your date from the hotel or meet at the location you have already agreed to. If the location seems inappropriate or unsafe, go back to your hotel. Try to contact your date at that location or leave a message on an answering machine. Always make sure a friend or family member knows your plans and has your contact information. And if possible, carry a mobile phone at all times.

Get yourself out of a jam
Never do anything you feel unsure about. If you are in any way afraid of your date, use your best judgment to diffuse the situation and get out of there. Excuse yourself long enough to call a friend for advice, ask someone else on the scene for help or slip out the back door and drive away. If you feel you are in danger, call the police; it’s always better to be safe than sorry. Never worry or feel embarrassed about your behavior; your safety is much more important than one person’s opinion of you.

Don't accept lifts
Initially, don't go home with your date, invite them back to your home or accept a lift.

Don't get financially involved
Play it safe when it comes to your money. Never send anyone money or offer financial assistance to someone you have just started contact with. If someone mentions financial difficulties and needing assistance then please contact us so we can investigate this on your behalf.

Identify a scam
It is important that you are able to identify the motives of the person you are in contact with to avoid being caught up in any kind of scam. If you come across members that you are just not sure about and you feel may be out there with the intention to scam then err on the side of caution and please contact us so we can investigate further for you.

Look out for:
• Mention of being in some form of financial difficulty or needing financial assistance. This can come in the form of money to pay for a visa, airfare or to help a sick relative. They can range from emails requesting assistance to transfer funds to your account for which you will be financially rewarded through to emails saying you have won a lottery.
• You are receiving emails or calls within a matter of weeks (if not days) where the other person says that they are totally in love with you despite never having met you. The emails may also be long and romantic but appear to be about nothing.
• Any mention of friends that have successfully met someone online from Australia and they wish to do the same.
• Emails contains words such as:-
o structure
o marriage agency
o They talk about Russian men being alcoholics and not knowing how to treat women.

While liars, cheaters and imposters certainly ply their craft on the Web, you’ll also find them in nightclubs and offline dating services, cocktail parties or even sitting across from you at your local café. Regardless of where you meet someone, dating is never a risk-free activity, but a little caution will reduce your risk in matters of the heart.

Creative Date Ideas
If you want to inject a little romance or spontaneity into a date, without breaking the bank, try following some of these ideas. You might just surprise yourself – and your partner!
1. Hike to the top of a mountain for a picnic.
2. Take a rowboat out on a lake at sunset.
3. Go up to the top of a building in a large city and take in the view.
4. Dress for a formal party, and then walk down the streets singing love songs.
5. Find a dark, romantic bistro with great coffees and desserts, or an independent book store that encourages browsing.
6. Find a rarely-used corner deep in the stacks of your library. Blow the dust off some musty old volume and read it aloud together. Steal a few hot kisses.
7. Pretend you've just won the lottery. "Shop" for your dream furnishings in elegant craft galleries, jewellery stores, and similar shops.
8. Test drive a sports car together.
9. Visit a specialty food factory such as a chocolate factory.
10. Browse a ritzy museum, gift shop or art gallery. And discuss all you see.
11. Drive along the outer borders of your city or county, exploring new neighbour hoods and villages where you've never been.
12. Ride a city's entire public rail transit system, going out on remote branch lines, just for the heck of it.
13. Spend the whole evening dressed and acting as characters from a play, movie, or book that you both enjoyed.
14. Speak only gibberish and let your thoughts be understood from your emotions, gestures, and tone.
15. Explore a wild and scenic place you've always wanted to check out.
16. Walk around celebrity neighbour hoods, looking for glimpses of the rich and famous.
17. Do something completely out of character--something you ordinarily wouldn't be caught dead even thinking about.
18. Go explore a local flea market one Saturday.
19. Pretend you’re a tourist! Get a guide book for your city. You will be amazed at all the attractions that are hidden nearby.
20. Star gazing - Get a book on constellations and watch the stars. This can be especially fun during a meteor shower.